Not-So-Useful Lessons Learned From Barbara Cartland
These are the ideas and attitudes that may be gleaned from reading Barbara Cartland novels:
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Any problem can be solved by marrying a rich man.
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Said rich man will help because he is a good man.
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Even if said man were a "bad" man before, he will be inspired by the innate goodness and intelligence of an innocent girl in distress to become a good man.
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The man you fall in love with will see your innate goodness and respect them, despite the strange and possibly scandalous circumstances in which you find yourself.
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The hero of your life is the only good man who will be attracted to you. Almost without fail, however, villains will be drawn to you like iron filings to the magnet.
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All mentally retarded children will end up trying to throttle a person or animal to death. Usually it's a puppy.
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Don't worry too much about said children - they will die after serving the purpose of involving you with the love of your life.
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Children of the man you love, born of a woman other than you, will only live if they are sweet, female, and not part of the line of succession.
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No matter how intelligent you are, the man you fall in love with is always more intelligent, better educated, and more canny.
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Women should never, ever find fault with men who treat them badly the women are in love with them.
Never fear, there's still plenty more to be added.